Monday, August 19, 2013

Bex Nursery.

I've been busy planning Beckham's nursery.  I originally planned on doing an owl themed room, but it ended up turning a little more girly than what I wanted.  Our little man needs a little boy room, not a little girl one!! Steve is such a sweet heart, he would always tell me the owl theme was  a good idea etc.. Well, when I told him I'm changing the theme Steve was all for it! He kept telling me what a BETTER idea that would be.  So, I changed it to a nautical theme.  After I saw the Williams Nautica bed set. That changed my mind! It is sooo cute and is all boy.

 I haven't been able to do all the decorating that I had planned, because of bed rest.  Steve has been great and getting things that I ask for the nursery.  He's been working so hard and making it exactly the way that I've envisioned it.  I seriously have the best hubby.  I'm happy that Steve is enjoying putting together the nursery too, he gets really excited about how it's coming together as well!

Ill have to post pictures when it's completely finished, but here's a little preview:)

Hmm..what else? Oh! I had another doctor's appointment and I finally was able to get out of the house!! I was so excited.  I woke up at 6 that morning and couldn't sleep, it was like Christmas. Seriously though, I used to take for granite doing every day things.  The appointment went great, everything looks the same.  My doctor said we can start breathing easier come the end of September, when Beckham will be 30 weeks.

Here I am at 25 weeks! It was nice to actually get dressed!

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Life is Full of Surprises.

I went back to work for 2 weeks and loved getting out of the house for 4 hrs a day.  It was nice to be back in my normal routine (sorta).  I LOVE having a schedule and being productive. It's just how I am. I have always been this way.
Steve and I went to the doctor's for my regular check up and we were excited to see our little man again.  They measured him via ultrasound, and he is still growing a week a head of my due date! He is healthy and I loved seeing him!! Seriously.  Miracle every time I see him.
They also measured my cervix, and unfortunatley it looked thinner.. My doctor was on vacation, and so the nurse advised that I go back on bed rest until I heard from my doctor.  So, that's what I did.

My doctor called me two days later in the evening.  I was really surprised to get a call from him considering it was already 6:30ish.  Side note-My doctor is the best doctor ever. Steve and I are sooo grateful that he is our doctor. He genuinely cares about me and Beckham.
Any way, so he called to check on me and to see how I was doing.  Wanted to make sure I wasn't getting contractions etc.. He then told me that it is critical that I am on bed rest. I'm to be on bed rest until Beckham is born.  My heart sank.
Once I got off the phone with my doctor I told Steve the news.  I felt worried, and wondered how am I going to be on bed rest until November?
I am so grateful for Steve.  He is such an amazing husband. I could tell he was worried as well, but was very positive and knew just what I needed to hear.

I can't even express on this blog how grateful and humble I have felt the past week.  We have such amazing family and friends who have gone above and beyond for us.  Simple visits, phone calls, meals, letting me know that people are here for us.  There are so many things that I could list and go on and on of service that has already been done for us.  Steve and I are very blessed.

I honestly didn't know HOW I was going to lay here for months...I prayed for guidance and peace. I had the thought come to mind that I need to make myself a schedule. So that's what I did.
 I'm now learning Swedish, baby sign, making file folder games and I have a list of other things that I'm going to be doing until our little one is here.  It has made such a difference.  I feel happier, and how can I complain?  Every day I get to feel our little one kicking around.  He reminds me why I am laying here day after day.  A couple months of laying here is nothing because in the long run we get a baby boy at the end of this.

This morning I got a phone call from my manager, the claims manager and the HR department letting me know that they are laying me off. After talking to them I started to cry.  I felt both sadness and peace.  Steve and I have been praying and talking about what the plan is when Beckham is born.  Steve graduates next May, so we were leaning on the idea of me working until than. Steve and I both knew that we received our answer.  I'm going to be a stay at home mommy! What I have longed for, for years!!! We both feel at peace and are excited that I'm going to be the one raising him.
Life is definitely full of surprises, but what comfort it is knowing that God is in charge.

Here I am at 22 1/2 weeks! I'm now at 24 1/2 and my belly is definitely getting bigger!!:) Love seeing my belly get bigger--means our little guy is too!

**Baby Update: **
-Beckham is a pound and 6oz. (as of last Tuesday)
-I crave sweets, especially ICE CREAM!! 
-I wake up every morning between 2 and 3 to use the restroom
-Beckham sometimes wakes me up in the night! He really moves around at night
-I got a bloody nose once a day for a week. Thank goodness that has stopped!
-My hair is getting thicker and nails longer..I know that will end come his due date

Thursday, August 8, 2013

Bed Rest.

I went on pretty strict bed rest for over a month.  I would have to lay flat unless I needed to take a shower or use the restroom.  This was VERY hard for me.  I have always been such a busy body.  I love to be getting things done and feeling productive.  I love being social. I remember feeling in despair at times, just laying on the couch and alone.  I felt helpless.  I kept wondering why I couldn't have a normal pregnancy.
I know, I know. I really shouldn't complain, but this is how I felt.

During the first few weeks laying down I started to feel Beckham.  I swear every time I started to feel that sadness come over me I would feel some movement of our little guy.  I began to realize that even though this pregnancy is hard.  It's all so worth it.  I have the amazing miracle of growing our little baby. I prayed for years, I cried for so  many years waiting for him. And he's here.  I can't complain.  I've been soaking it all up, and enjoying every movement.  I am so grateful for our little miracle.

I continued to go in for a multiple check ups at my doctor's office.  Beckham continue's to grow strong and healthy!  My cervix even started to look a little thicker with the stitch.  My doctor said he felt comfortable with me getting up more and preparing my body to go back to work. But I would only be able to go back to work for 4 hrs a day, and than it's back to bed rest.  I was thrilled.  So, I started getting up more and easing my body back into it.

Steve would take me places and we would look at baby stuff.  My mom and sisters would take me places as well.  It felt so good to get out of the house.  Easing back into it wasn't by walking around the stores though.  I had to be pushed around in a wheel chair.  Or if I was really lucky I would get a motorized one.  I got a good kick out of it when I was riding the motorized ones. If I needed to back up it would make a loud BEEP-BEEP-BEEP noise.  (basically the sound of a utility truck)


I also got tons of cuddle time with baby Victoria.  One of the coolest things is that when she cries Beckham starts kicking.  When I ask Victoria about Beckham she smiles and laughs.  I recorded this video that shows it.  (Baby Taggart-the one i'm referring to in the video is Kjersti's baby)

I've received so much love and support during this pregnancy.  So many great family and friends who have brought us dinner, and visiting us.  We are very blessed!!!


Miracles Happen-Part 2

When Steve walked in the hospital, I felt some relief. We both hugged as tears kept going down our faces.  We were both worried.  I started to feel more pressure and cramping in my back so we told the front desk.  They then got a room set up for me, so that I could lay down and get things started.
As Steve and I were in our hospital room we both said a prayer to our Father in Heaven to please protect Beckham.  It was a really tender moment for Steve and I.  How grateful I am for Steve and for the power of prayer. The nurse came soon after and started getting me hooked up to monitors and listening to Beckham's heart.

My dr. came in told me the procedure again, and what things could happen.  He told me both the good and bad.  If the cerclage works I go on bed rest and hopefully go full term.  The risk of doing the cerclage now (since my cervix is thin) is that the needle he uses to sew the cervix could break the water and we lose him.  Of course I had a lot of fear when he told me the risk, BUT we would lose him if we didn't do this procedure.  The dr. than said we need to get this going before the cervix thins any more.  We told the dr. we want to go ahead with the procedure but we wanted to be left alone for a minute so that I could receive a blessing.  Both of our parents came to the hospital as well, and so Steve and both of our dad's were able to give me a blessing.  I am SO grateful for the power of the priesthood.  I felt comfort and peace as the nurses wheeled me back into the operating room.

I won't go into detail about the actual procedure, but I know that Beckham and I were both being watched over.  I have aways been so scared of the idea of an epidural, and sure enough I had to have an epidural for this procedure. I also had to be wide awake.  It's amazing how calm I felt, and how I didn't care what needed to be done.  I just wanted our baby safe.  It's crazy how much I already love Beckham.  I would do anything for him.  I put all my fears aside, and relied on my Father in Heaven.
I was wheeled back into the room and was told that I would need to stay overnight. The procedure was a success and our little one is safe.  I woke up so many times that night for multiple reasons, but I just remember feeling so overwhelmed with gratitude and joy.  How grateful that I didn't lose our little Beckham that night.

Dr. ordered that I go on bed rest.  Possibly bed rest for the entire pregnancy.  He has never had this happen before.  That's why this is such a miracle.  Most women who find out they have an incompetence cervix usually ends bad.  They usually miscarry the first pregnancy and than for other pregnancies they do a cerclage.  Dr said he usually does a cerclage at 13 weeks, and way before the cervix starts thinning.  Our baby is a miracle.  Every time I've talked to the nurse-Cindy, she always says she knows there was divine intervention that day.  She knows it.  Steve and I know it to.