Peace.

Thanksgiving week wasn't the greatest for Steve and I. It should have been one of the most happiest weeks we could of had. We were able to spend an ENTIRE week together-no work, no homework, and spending time with the Ford family at the cabin. Yet we had a cloud hang over us. We felt a huge emotion of sadness, anger and "picked on me" feeling.

Steve and I have been really excited to share the news to everyone that we were adopting, and really dug into the adoption paperwork. All of our families have been so supportive to us, and I've never felt so much love from everyone. But, it was almost a "grieving" period that we had to go through. That we may not have a little one that has Steve's charming blue eyes, and my blonde hair, our physical features. I won't get the opportunity to see my belly grow. Get to wear maternity clothes and exclaim to everyone that "I'm Pregnant!"

This week has been different. My heart has been full this week. Full of so much gratitude and peace. I've never felt so much love from my Savior either. I know he has been wrapping his loving arms around me, and letting me know that he has a bigger and better plan for us.

Steve and I have the desire to raise children-our children. Is it really that important that our baby has our physical features? That I wasn't pregnant with the little one?

I know that we will love our baby no matter how we get our baby. Our baby must be very special. So special that they are getting to bless two different lives. The birthparent who has the miracle of getting to carry him/her for 9 months and then getting to bless ours for the eternities. God has a plan, a far better one that I can comprehend and I feel blessed that he has given Steve and I the opportunity to find our baby/babies through adoption. It's been such a humbling experience so far and I'm grateful for this. I couldn't be happier.